Xmas Wrapping

 If you know me in real life, or if you've been reading my blog for a while, you'll know that I don't get my knickers in a twist over Xmas. Don't get me wrong, when I worked for a living I was more than happy to get ten days off work - by Xmas Eve I'd have overseen the production and service of over two thousand five-course Christmas dinners and was almost dead - but since escaping corporate hell, Christmas is just like any other public holiday, an annoying interruption to my routine, but although its impossible to ignore (we're bombarded as soon as Hallowe'en is over), I certainly don't stress over it.

As usual we'll be spending our Xmas Day with The Dead Relatives Society, our band of happy orphans. Sometimes we go out for a curry, this year they're round at ours. We'll exchange a few carefully chosen gifts, listen to some cool tunes (more of that in a bit), enjoy some home-cooked food, play board games and, needless to say, have a few drinks.

Some people bang on about being frugal for buying their Xmas wrap in the January sales, we take it to another level. Throughout the year we save all the plain brown paper that any deliveries arrive wrapped in, iron it and decorate it. It's better than cheap, it's free.

Here's this year's wrapping paper - nothing says Xmas like a sumo wrestler.

As usual, I celebrated the Winter Solstice by bringing the garden greenery indoors, festooning the picture frames with holly, ivy, laurel, yew and rosemary, all of which grow in abundance. The branch we've suspended from the mantelpiece was brought down during one of our many winter storms and the vintage-style globes were from fair trade company, Ian Snow (bought via Ebay four years ago).

We have fairy lights up all year round.

The embroidered angel was a gift from Lynn & Philip many years ago.

The demented William lookalike was bought for 50p from Age UK in Wolverhampton when I visited the Evelyn de Morgan exhibition with my other friend Lynn, a few weeks ago.

This year's wreath. This will stay up until it falls apart.

A large chunk of the silly season will be spent reading as I've got a huge pile of books to wade through.

I'm a third of the way through A Place of Greater Safety by the wonderful - and sorely missed - Hilary Mantel, a 1000 page epic set during the French Revolution. Like The Mirror and the Light, Wolf Hall and Bring Up The Bodies, it's one of those books that sits on the bookcase for ages as just looking at it makes you feel slightly intimidated but once you crack it open, its almost impossible to put down.

Once I've finished with Robespierre, Desmoulins and Danton I'm spoilt for choice. These four books were a quid from the clearance chazza; there's Trust, The 19th Wife, A Terrible Kindness and what will probably be my next read, Mermaid Singing, the memoirs of two Australian writers who left post-war London to live in Kalmynos, the Greek sponge diving island off the coast of Kos we visited earlier in the year. 

I've got three biographies to read, on loan from my swimming pals, Dave and Lisa. Noddy Holder is, I'm sure you know, one of Walsall's many famous sons. I'm looking forward to learning about Jerry Garcia, I love his music but know nothing about him. Charles Manson has always been a source of fascination, when I first met Jon he had a poster of both him and Take That up in his kitchen. That should have been a warning but, to be honest, I was more disturbed by Take That ...

As usual, 25th December will be spent in the company of blokes & they'd probably not notice if I sat around in my dressing gown but as I've never dressed for anyone but myself, I'll no doubt be wearing something wildly inappropriate and over-the-top. Here's one contender....

I spotted this 1970s lurex maxi by Spinney for £5 the other day, a near-identical replacement for the vintage Bernshaw maxi I've been wearing to festivals since the dawn of time. The silver platforms are current Monsoon, unworn and snaffled for £3 from the same charity shop as this Cosucos Halo Crown which came in its original box and cost £4. 

After trying one in Corfu, Jon's smitten with Espresso Martinis and he's been practicing making his own. They taste delicious, I tell him, but I might need another just to be sure.

So, let's talk about Xmas music. I don't mean that tired & cliched old shit I have to endure every time I enter a shop from the 1st December onwards, making me so irrationally angry I want to rip my ears off, I'm talking about cool, alternatives like the ones I've selected for this year's Dead Relatives Society Festive Playlist. Join us wherever in the world you are, let's have a virtual party.

1. The Ramones - Merry Xmas (I Don't Want to Fight Tonight)

2. The Waitresses -  Christmas Wrapping

3. Julian Casablancas - I Wish It Was Christmas Today

4. Goat - Let it Burn

5. No Doubt - Oi To The World

6. Joan Jett & The Blackhearts - Little Drummer Boy

7. The Futureheads - Christmas Was Better in The 80s

8. St Etienne - I Was Born on Xmas Day

9. Stiff Little Fingers - White Christmas

10. The Wedding Present - Step Into Christmas

11. Sparks - Thank God Its Not Christmas

12. The Manic Street Preachers - Last Christmas

13. Cocteau Twins - Frosty The Snowman

14. Orbital - Christmas Chime

15. The Fall - Hark The Herald Angels Sing

16. Run DMC - Christmas in Hollis

17. Aztec Camera - Walk Out To Winter

18. The Kills - Silent Night

19. The Long Blondes - Christmas Is Cancelled

20. Throwing Muses - Santa Claus

21. The Wombats - Is This Christmas?

 

Have fun whatever you get up to and see you on the other side!