Wednesday 30 November 2011

The Mid-Week Moan: Should I Care If I Look My Age?

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You know how I hate so-called experts imparting their advice on us, trying to make women feel insecure and unworthy? Well yesterday I came across a book called "How Not To Look Old" which made me almost apoplectic with rage. It offered this age-defying advice for us over forties:


Hair: too short bangs.. too long hair parted down the middle… high hair…an updo… too dark hair… a solid block of hair colour… grey hair…



Now I'm a stubborn old bint, if I'm told not to do something I have to go and do the opposite. I went straight to the nearest mirror, grabbed a tail comb and parted my hair down the centre, then I headed to Boots for my usual box of raven black hair dye. 

1960s Dollyrockers Maxi dress (£4.99, eBay), 1950s Scottish mohair cape (£1, jumble sale), fur collar (handmade by me), grey platforms (£5, local retail)

Skirts: skirts that are too long.. too short… the wrong shape…worn with the wrong shoes…

This had me reaching for a maxi dress like a shot. Are we supposed abandon our style, set fire to our wardrobes and queue at Marks and Spencer for a knee-length skirt as soon as we reach the magical age of 40? What's the wrong shape anyway? With my scrawny, angular frame pencil skirts and pointy shoes do me no favours but who's to say they are "wrong" if I wanted to wear them?


If I look my age then so what? I'm 45 next week, I've got crow's feet, myopia, greying temples, arthritic joints and a total hip replacement. My face bears the scars of a life well-lived, I'm proud of every line, achieved by staying out all night, sleeping in my make up, boozing, lazing on an Asian beach for months at a time and generally living life to the full. I don't want to hide the fact that I'm middle-aged, I'm proud to have got this far.




Am I odd for finding Keith Richard's hedonism-ravaged looks far sexier than Sir Cliff's clean-living ones? 


Non-Brits can learn about Cliff Richard here


Bet I'm not the only one.



I'm not ashamed of my age or the battering my body's taken reaching it. Better to have lived and lost it than never to have lived at all. 

104 comments:

  1. Well said - I think if you have innate style you can transcend 'the rules', personally I'd rather see well kept long hair than a 'mum cut'! Mind you, any grey hairs I *might* have are ruthlessly exterminated!

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  2. I don't think women can escape from how we 'should' look or act at any age and stage of our lives. It's pretty depressing but I think you've got the right attitude.

    I'm afraid neither Keith nor Cliff hold any attraction for me, but I know who would have the best stories! :)

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  3. Vix - you're fab. I totally agree with you about Cliff, as well - he really freaks me out. I hate these rules so called 'style' experts impart - you shouldn't wear so and so if you're this shape, you shouldn't wear pink if you have red hair, older women shouldn't have long hair - men have none of this guff thrown at them! I think the only thing that's ever important is how you carry yourself - and you do that with grace and glamour and utter gorgeosity.

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  4. Bravo Vix. I hate Cliff anyway, he has far too much work done. urgh.

    And kudos to you for wearing whatever you like! No-one should dictate to you what you should or shouldn't wear. I love your style, that's what makes you unique :)

    And I can spot the tartan in your outfit today.... HAPPY ST ANDREWS DAY!! :P (ha, just had to get that in!)

    Jules
    andsuddenlyisee.blogspot.com

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  5. Well you know I HATE rules too! I certainly have a block of hair colour and will wear what the f*** I want. I have changed certain things over the years, not because of my age but with my age, does that make sense?

    Also I don't care if I look my age, I am my age. Welcome to the 45 club, when is it?

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  6. I don't care what "they" say, I am wearing what I want, like you I have earned it, and I'll own it.
    Sooner or later I will be entitled to the label ecentric crone.....
    won't that be fun!!

    Keith...not so much...but his "son" Johnny Depp, oh yeah...

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  7. Did you read my mind?!?!?!?! Yesterday I found out I have a few precancerous spot on my skin that need to be removed and ya know what, so what!!!! That's what I get from a life fueled by sun worship, it's who I am and it shows that I have enjoyed and still enjoy my life! I love your attitude and philosophy Vix, you are as beautiful outside as you are inside! We need to love ourselves no matter what and remember who we are because of what we have lived through. I love you girl! I love your long black hair parted down the middle, your sexy platform boots, your lil hot pants, but most of all I love that middle finger you so proudly throw up to conformity!
    Foreverbeautifulyouaretome~
    Krista

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  8. <3 Your so right. And may I say you look absolutely fabulous. It's so scary to get old in today's society. Like it's something to be ashamed of. No one can avoid getting old. Where's the respect towards life experience and wisdom that comes with age??? No nip & tuck is work more than that. And when it comes to looks, most rockers just seem to get better looking with age.

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  9. What we are told in the media is designed to harbor the insecurity required to guilt/pressure us into buying stuff.

    I don't buy it!

    I once had a little girl tell me that if you are unhappy, you should just skip -- because it's impossible to be unhappy when you are skipping.

    I would bet skipping falls under the "no" list too. The things that make a woman happy are the things she is supposed to give up once she reaches "a certain age." I think it is time for a mass rebellion.

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  10. I completely agree with you Vix, I hate all that bollocks about 'How to dress you age' - stuff and nonsense I say! Funnily enough, I've got a hairdresser's appointment tomorrow to get a fringe cut into my freshly dyed dark brown hair. And as for getting rid of the maxis...never!
    xxx

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  11. Here here and im jumping for joy while clapping my hands ;-)) A fab post and you are so right about the lines and the scares on our bodies to me they are our life journey and and so should be celebrated and looked at fondly and tenderly each and every one tells a part of a life story. And we should wear what ever we feel comfortable in and what represent's ourselfs and our own personality. I raise my glass to you and your gorgeous self and every other over 40 lady embracing and enjoying life and themselves... ;-)) dee xxx

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  12. OIh how i'd choose Keith Richard over Cliff Richard any day [he's too squeaky clean but I bet there's something finding in his cupboards!]. Life is too short to not dress how you want and live your life how you want. I'd rather have a million tales to tell when i'm on my death bed then having a load of regrets because I was more bothered about peoples perceptions or views [note to self to remember this when my mother gets angry about me moving countries]. Yeah sometimes it's easier said then done.

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  13. "They" can shove it - I think we're supposed to hurry up and die rather than gawd forbid, get old.
    Or fat.
    Or wrinkled.

    What is wrong with looking your age?
    Or not aspiring to be hairless and plastic-perfect?

    And don't get me started on that DISGUSTING mutton-dressed-as thing!!

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  14. Vixcita,
    I wish there was more women like you!
    You have loads of style and PAZZAZ.love your colorful maxi dress and eyeing your cape. I totally agree on everything you said except for the make up sleeping ,but hey you still look hot you earn it!Live life hard, you only have one life!

    Besotes

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  15. You look gorgeous. Why would anyone want to look like everyone else just because you've had the good fotune to have lived a little? Be yourself, it's ageless.

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  16. I hate the how to dress for your age crap.....just because you are over 40 you are supposed to dress & look like a frump? I get called on for my age all the time ( having 3 girls in all levels of school..elementary, high school & university)......some flattering comments & some moms of a certain age shouldn't wear shorts or knee high boots comments! I am taking my 45 year old body to the beach next week in a bikini & shorts & above the freaking knee dresses!

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  17. Yeah, because young people look SO great ALL of the time :/ What a load of poop, I'll probably get worse with age out of spite. Love your green capey thing btw :)

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  18. Yes! You can tell that pinched look on a lot of women's faces even though they are impeccably turned out, that means fear of not being able to keep it up (literally!) for much longer. I just wouldn't want to do that to myself.
    In many cultures old age is so positive and people look forward to it - that's how it should be!

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  19. dear vix,

    first, thank you for your sweet comment on my sequined dress. i agree with you totally. i like it both ways and i'll prob figure out a few new ways to wear it too. so thanks.

    i'm with you on this age thing completely. i'll be 54 in a few weeks and i'm so fine with it. in fact i'm more than fine with it...i'm loving it. if we are not supposed to dye our hair or wear it gray then what are we to do? i'm giving up dye b/c it is irritating my skin so much not b/c some expert told me to.

    and i'm so with you on keith. my favorite quote of his hangs in my kitchen on a chalkboard...

    "i'd hate to have to go around thinking of health and shit like that." k. richards.

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  20. Vix, you are completely stunning. Your style and passion for life are infectious. You are warm, funny, witty, sassy and creative. All of this is reflected in how you look. I am 43 and proud that my face and body reflect my journey through life. I might dye my hair, but I'm proud that I've got a face full of laughter lines, "surprise" lines around my eyebrows where I've looked astonished because of all the wonderful things I've been experiencing, and all the evidence that shows I'm the age I am. I hate the concept that looking your age is an abomination. I feel better in my body now than I did 20 years ago (even though I sometimes get sad it can't do what it used to) and I'm proud to be 43, with all that it brings. Like I said in my post a few weeks back, strap on the nipple tassles if they make you feel amazing. The person who wrote that book is feeding off women's fears and making a living perpetuating the myth that age is "bad". What a crock.

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  21. YaY Vix!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    Who's Cliff? (I honestly don't know!)
    But we all know and love Keith!
    I have been so busy trying on different outfits for a Blogger Bash tonight and have been judging myself back and forth.
    You made me see the light!!!!
    THANK YOU !
    I am - I am 47 - I wear short skirts - I AM ME! Unique!
    Who wants to look like the same old H&M ad anyway?????
    I LOVE YOU!
    Hugs and love forever,
    Reva

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  22. wow this is really almost offensive, books like this should be burnt because sad enough there are always insecure people who believe what they are told in books or magazines of this type.and i´m really like you, always doing the opposite of what i´m told haha.
    by the way you look gorgous with your too long and at the middle parted hair and the loo long fabulous skirt;)
    love and kiss,mary

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  23. Rules are shite! yes! I find both cliff and keith pretty revolting, but yes, I'd definitely go for keith!

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  24. Well said Vix! I was worried that when I turned 30 I would be expected to dress differently but f*** it, I dress for me, wearing what I like and what suits me. In the summer I was at a car boot with my mum and was mistaken for a uni student; a huge compliment to both me(30) and my mum(62)...well, it made our day :)

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  25. Good for you - I love your attitude! The idea that one might wish to be some age other than one is is profoundly depressing. The tabloids and fashion magazines talk about people who look their age as if they have committed a crime, or at least a faux pas - its madness! Look at Madonna, Kylie and the like with their faces full of plastic fillers and eyebrows raised by Botox - they seem very sad to me and no-one would mistake them for youngsters. Aging is a fact of life, and infinitely preferable to the alternative LOL! xxx

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  26. I agree with you completely! Growing up in the 1970's it seemed like all women, mom-aged and older, had roller sets and wore elastic waists and sensible shoes. I feared that some magic crossing point would do the same to me. Thank goddess I was wrong!

    Here's a fun quote:
    "Life should not be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, martini in one hand and chocolate in the other, thoroughly used up and screaming "WOO HOO what a ride!""

    xoxo, Anita

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  27. Kudos to you! I am sick of aging actresses shot full of Botox that have been lifted, tucked and their fat sucked out. As an artist, I find a face full of expression and life's wear is far more interesting than one that has all the expression botoxed out of it! I love your maxi and only stop wearing them if you feel like it. -T

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  28. great shot of Sir Cliff!! what a stiff? ah dear the age question. just turned freakin fifty and menopause in high gear. face suddenly aging in front of my very eyes. i need a stiff alright! a stiff drink!! woo ha ha!!!!!

    love your look.

    love you.. as ever a tonic.

    xo

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  29. Haha, Vix, you're so cool.

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  30. when in doubt I shall read this out......you are an inspiration to us all..... at any age!!xx

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  31. Yep,give me Keith any day of the bloody week!
    What a load of twaddle it all is! If I were to look to my "peers" as a guide on how to look my age,I'd be looking like the most boring,personality free,styleless arse out there!Ho hum tedium!Got no time for that shit.It's just fear of the different.
    Feck 'em! Life IS worth living,after all!
    Love YOU and all your wrinkly bit!
    Helga xxxXXXxxx

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  32. Well said, Vix. I'm sick of seeing older women on the tv botoxed to the nines. Embrace age and enjoy!

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  33. I've stopped reading anything regarding fashion from magazines or newspapers. It is all such tripe, I don't even thing the writers themselves believe it. I agree with you, every line is a badge of pride for getting this far, there are enough people who aren't so lucky xx

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  34. Who listens to the media so-called fashion gurus? What's in one year is out the next so it wasn't much good in the first place. Where what you want, when you want. You look fantastic.
    Love from Mum
    xx

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  35. I agree totally! and you look fantastic! Have a great night xxx

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  36. I love this post Vix. And I am so glad your wrote it. Why? Because nobody would actually guess your age- probably because there's not a shred of "old" in you. You are beautiful, fun and vibrant, and by sharing your style with us online, you are an inspiration not just for the over 40 set, but for women of all ages on what great style looks like.

    The media is NOT an authority of stuff like this- it is utter bullshit to follow ridiculous and "aging" advice. I love how you embrace both your youth and your age. That for me is the successful secret to a life well lived.

    Love your outfit by the way. I think you may turn my head towards maxi's yet. xo. Bella Q

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  37. And that's why I love you! There's youth and there's timelessness - the second is so much more interesting! xxx

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  38. Well, I'm a lucky lass and have seen you in the flesh, so to speak(!), and you look freakin' gorg! Yeah, not the same as all the other over 40s, me included, and that's what is so fabulous and unique and makes you, YOU!
    It's like sizeism tho'...I stand in TKMaxx,(cos they tend to have a more interesting selection of clothes than Evans), and just say out loud "Just cos I'm fat, I haven't lost my sense of style!"
    KR over CR deffo!
    Z xx
    PS I hope you burned that book!

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  39. as a wardrobe stylist...i cringe when i see blatant "rules" which put everyone in a certain category...it is about finding your personal style...what works for you...not your age...or what "trend" is being highlighted for that week...

    i say..."keep on being fabulous!"

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  41. Age ain't nothing but a number - it's how you feel inside. I used to read the style guides, but they just contradict themselves. The 'rules' of true style apply at any age - it's about knowing what you like and being happy in it. And dressing for yourself, not others. If I didn't know how old you are, I would have put you at least 10 years younger, darling. You are such an inspiring person, you've really lived and are living a great life.
    Personally neither Keith nor Cliff do anything for me, but I know who I'd rather have a night out with!

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  42. I think people who make "rules" are desperately trying to grasp at the illusion of sanity by trying to make the world around them seem ordered and compliant with their own desires. Their desperate attempts to not only appear sane themselves but control what they see gives away the very insanity the are so afraid of.

    I think you look great! We are what we are. Each to their own.

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  43. I was reading a daily fashion posts type blog written by this six-foot tall, solidly plus sized girl who said, in one context or the other, that she'd always worried about following fashion rules, am I too tall for this, am I too big for that, what would people think if I wore the other, until she said it suddenly struck her: "I'm not like everyone else... so why should I look like I am?". I love LOVE LOVED this. I know it sounds so corny/inspirational but I really think of that girl more than twice during outfit selections before I go out some Friday nights. Would you rather dress to please someone else or yourself? And I think you really answered this question swimmingly. If you have FANTASTIC style (check), and a personality to support it (check), and you should be you! Done and done.

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  44. You look fab and you know what suits you and that's the point isn't it- if you're comfortable, happy in it and it suits you (and even if it doesn't -boo hiss to those who mock/disparage, it's our body!) then wear it. Honestly, they're hardly reinventing the wheel are they in this book- too long, too short, the wrong shape- well yes, if it's wrong for you (e.g. wrong in the sense that it makes you feel yuck, causes you to trip over it and break you ankle, get a cold bottom leading to Pneumonia, give you a nasty rash from itchy material blah blah) they're just pedalling old reused, boring information with no originality just a new gimicky title! Grrr, I emulate your rage!

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  45. What a woman you are, BANG!!! STRAIGHT TO MY HEART with a smile:
    Better to have lived and lost it than never to have lived at all.
    I AM SO PROUD TO BE YOUR FRIEND and over 50, yeahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

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  46. Ahhh, those rule books! Made for fools, Vix!
    The idea that anyone can dictate formulae which are supposed to apply to all of us is laughable. You only have to look around in Blogland and see wonderful women having fun with self-expression through their sense of style - all ages, all shapes, all styles, all doing their own thing. How dull for us all to be the same.
    What none of these rule books seem to address is personality. That's what makes an outfit work, whether worn by an 18 year old or a 70 year old. If you've a brain, humour and confidence, you can do (or wear) ANYTHING!
    You look beautiful, not despite your age, but because of it, because that's who you are. Love that maxi (of course!) and bloody love you, you stubbornly gorgeous bint! xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

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  47. Vix you are a goddess, unique and to be admired. Fashion is, what fashion is to you, and what allows you to feel yourself.

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  48. B*gger the 'rules.' And WHO are those people who decide what the 'rules' should be? You look a-may-zing, Vix - always.

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  49. As you know ,I'm 70 and like you am proud of my lines I have earned all my lines too ,Whoopeee.....Iknow what suits me ,not what the fashion guru's tell me ,I coloured my hair today ,slightly red! whoops Ahh well ..love Jan xx

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  50. "Age is strictly a case of mind over matter. If you don't mind, it doesn't
    matter." Jack Benny ♥
    I'll be 49 next February, my only regret is I didn't get here sooner! ;-D

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  51. love your words so much... great post! great outfit as well. the print of this dress is just adorable.

    as you know, i looooove keith richards... and of course he lived his life and still does.

    http://wardrobexperience.blogspot.com

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  52. Here is my 2 cents Vix:
    If you were just like EVERYONE ELSE and followed all these rules like alot of other woman do. I don't think any of us would have found you through blogland. I don't think much of us would be following you... and not many of us would have come to love you as much as we do!!
    I know I followed you because you do what you want, you dress how you want (AND I AM CRAZY ABOUT YOUR STYLE) You are unique and fun and inspiring. There is nothing inspiring about a flock of woman sheep who all get botox and are setting up emergency appointments because they have spotted a wrinkle they don't want anyone to catch a glimpse of. Who all have the lastest celebrity hairstyle and purchase the newest designer look for that season. *BLAHHHHH* to all them.... I mean.... BAAAAA BAAAA BAAAAAA little sheep.

    Lol thats all! =D

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  53. You should not be ashamed of your age you look fabulous and your hair is looking particulary lovely today (as it always does)!
    You look better than some women in their 20's so thats a load of rubbish.

    Also it does annoy me how some people think that once you hit 40 you have to dress dowdy! Thats not me I will never do that. You always look fab. Long hair rules ha ha

    xx

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  54. Awesome dress! Cliff Richard creeps me out, how can he still look that young?! :)

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  55. Lovely post and so true!

    Why wouldn't one want to show and revere the amazing tales of a life lived?!

    This fascination with not looking your age must die!

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  56. Good for you! I hate all the look your age buisness. I am 53 and wear my hair down to my backside and parted in the middle. And it's gray to boot. Do I care? And I always wear long skirts when I do wear them. As the saying goes, You are as young as you feel.

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  57. Vix, firstly - you look awesome for any age. Your face, hair and body look amazing. Secondly, these generic guides are sooooo wrong - if there's one thing advancing years teach us (although I'm deaf to it a lot of the time!) it's dress for your shape and what suits you. You have fabulous legs so of course you should be getting them out and NO ONE should be telling you otherwise. Aaargh, these sort of things really are awful (as is Cliff Richard - give me Keef...or Alan Rickman...or Nic Cage any day). xx

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  58. "I would rather regret the things that I have done than the things that I have not" Lucille Ball!

    Keith wins hands down!!!

    You always look sensational!

    xox

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  59. I hate the obsession with youth & constant pressure to look young, it's ridiculous. I hope you threw that wretched book in the bin. J'adore Keith x

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  60. You are spot on, gorgeous lady! It's a shame so many women give up and dress in uniform, dressing for "their age"....You're an inspiration-beautiful, proud and stylish! Xoxox

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  61. " Better to have lived and lost than never to have lived!" is my mantra! My mother is 91 and wouldn't be seen (nearly) dead in 'old lady' clothes. I have an arsenal of rubber bullets for the fashion age police. Or maybe a rubber outfit on my arse. I forget, it's my age dontcha know!

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  62. Amen Vix! You still look fabulous and most importantly, you are dressing the way you enjoy, not the way some killjoy dictates :-)

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  63. Vix you are wonderful exactly as you are, 45 or 85 I'll eternally be in awe of your sense of style and the lust for life that you exude. I totally agree, why should you try to hide the signs of a wonderful life? For the record, George Clooney is so much sexier when his hair's grey and he's not been airbrushed... Just saying. Love ya. Xx

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  64. Books like that make my blood boil! Like women don't have enough other insecurities as it is Grrr.

    If you ever go into Marks and buy that kind of skirt I'll be on the first train to your house to kick your arse!!

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  65. Give me Keith over Cliff any day! I'm hoping that book is some ancient vintage thing you bought at a car boot sale published in the 50s or something - but alas I fear that modern advice from some sources still runs along the same lines. Like I've said - it's like they'd rather that women over a certain age just didn't exist - where are the actual options or alternatives amidst this list of no no's? I can't discern a single one - are the over 40s supposed to just go naked? Great post as always! xx

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  66. Well said hun - you have impeccable style and look fabulous, doesn't matter what a silly book says! xo

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  67. Oh...why do we even read the stupid experts...i dunno what others think but here's my say...i come back to your blog daily (sometimes more than once) hoping you have updated because not just your style, but what you write and your take on life and fashion cheer me up...you have more life in you than most teenagers i know...and women are beautiful at any age and anyone would be lucky to be as attractive and full of joie de vivre as you at any age!

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  68. What everyone else has already said!

    How not to look old? Die at 20.

    Feck that, life is for living, with all its scars and gorgeous wrinkles! It's bleedin' character, non?!!

    Does Virgin Cliff have character? Who cares!

    Does the Vintage Vixen have character and beauty?

    In spades! Mwah, ma belle, well said! xxx

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  69. You said in an earlier post that The Fall hadn't improved with age. I saw them on my 40th birthday and neither have I!
    I can stand comfortably on the lower gun decks of HMS Victory and going on the life expectancy of Nelson's crew, back then, I'm already at a ripe old age!

    Mr B

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  70. I'm 35 next year and proud of it! I don't fear getting older.I know myself more now than I ever did. These books don't help women, they just make them fear life imo! x

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  71. I'm with u Vix; if it's the same book I think it is, the author is a botoxed, weight-obsessed hot mess!!! I love your blog for your style, your creativity, and your telling us all about your activities, projects, social life, everything! U are an inspiration, keep up the great work! I'm 61 & don't intend to ever dress my age!!

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  72. AMEN SISTER!!! I get the same feeling when I pick up a book that tells me how I should be dressing at age 43. I want to RIP IT TO SHREDS AND STOMP ON IT - right there in the shop. Who the feck do these people think they are trying to tell grown women and men with oodles of life experiences, both happy and sad, behind them, how NOT to dress? Why aren't they writing books aimed at 12y.o. girls telling them why short-shorts are probably gonna get them unwanted attention that they may be a tad too young to deal with yet? Hmmmm? I have a face untouched by surgery, I have lines, crows-feet, neck-crepe, lots of sun-damage from a joyful childhood spent in the South Pacific sun - I can look and dress how I want thanks. I've earned the right. No, you're not moaning Vix, you are standing up for yourself and speaking out on behalf of women who find Grazia-like mags a way to encourage women to turn into FREAKS!!! And I don't mean Super Freakin' like you are my treasure!!!!! xoxoxxoxoxxxoxoox

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  73. Was it that Charla Krupp book that's always bothered me with its lipstick rule? http://wendybrandes.com/blog/2008/12/hey-hey-charla/

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  74. Thank you!!!! I loved every word. Time for us to take back our power.

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  75. Ugh, anything that tells women how they should look at any age gets my feminist rage going. You always look amazing! I love the cape. Screw the rules.

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  76. HEAR HEAR!
    I haven't done nearly half of what you have...just feels like it LOL!

    Love the jewel like colours of your dress.

    I dyed my hair red on Monday, well because of the amount of grey, it's ginger on top and sides and a lovely shade of Auburn elshwere!
    AND I'm letting my hair grow, don't care if when the wind blows, I look like a scarecrow!
    Actually, now it's almost shoulder-length, had forgotten how cosy it is around your neck whenit's tucked in your coat collar...bliss!

    Sandie xx

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  77. I love you more with each post. You are quite the inspiration. Style and words. Thanks for being you, Vix!

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  78. You are gorgeous and I love you. This dress is wickedly fabulous too, by the way. :)

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  79. I always love what you're wearing because you have a frickin great sense of style. You don't stick to one thing you switch it up. But you always wear what YOU want to not what someone says is APPROPRIATE. Rock on girl!
    Karlene

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  80. Right on sister! Love your attitude and your apathy toward BS mainstream expectations.

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  81. Whoa you don't know how close to my heart this subject is! I've always been a style rebel and I purposely broke my "switch" when I was in my late teens. I turned 52 Tuesday, and all of these types of "advice" for women always seem so alien to me as I've never given a rat's a** to begin with! I can say with all certainty that Keith is infinitely intriguing and yes, charming too; what amazed (and still amazes) me most were his hands (okay & I'm obsessed with his hair in the 70s too.) I've always lived with the question "what if" to guide me, and due to that have had quite a charmed life that continues with every day. I may look my age, but non je ne regrette rien!
    XXX
    Suzanne

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  82. the only thing I shudder at a little is the idea of someone as awesome as you using store bought box hair color...but I am a stylist so I do this often anyhow ^_~

    I always tell my clients that no matter what their age, as long as they feel confident and beautiful, they can wear any nail color or hair color. A personal icon growing up in sleepy central PA was Mrs. Slocombe from the British comedy Are You Being Served? I used to sneak to watch it at 11 pm it on my tiny 3 channel tv in my room just to behold her in all her violet haired wonder and marvel at the idea of a woman that age wearing vivid hair color so proudly.

    I believe there are exceptions like if the hair is in bad condition and quite thin (not all looks work for all hair textures) however in that case a colorful wig might be just as appropriate depending on the woman!

    i adore your blog, was reccommended by a friend this evening indirectly and SO GLAD I DID!!

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  83. Your flair and confidence are captivating and you are all the more beautiful for having those qualities.

    I never really followed conventions when it came to my appearance, but after being diagnosed with breast cancer at age 48 (treated and now all's well), I wanted nothing more than to be able to grow old.

    I just turned 51 on Sunday (thanks for the birthday wishes on my blog), and will wear my greying hair long and my skirts short for as long as I damn well please.

    Like you, my skin has been baked by the Indian sun and my knees are shot from dancing bhangra for the past 10 years. But, I would never trade those experiences for unlined skin or non-creaky knees. And I'd rather have a face with character than one that looks like waxed fruit.

    http://www.joyatri.com

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  84. Grrr...I hate that kind of shit too!! It's up there with "Curvy Girls shouldn't wear XYZ".

    I think you are super rad just the way you are - there is always so much pressure on women to be this or that and it makes me so angry too.

    You rock that long hair - I think its just stunning!! I also love your sense of style.

    I am a strong believer in doing what makes you happiest in life and most of us will never be happy if we spend all our time trying to conform to these "so called" norms.

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  85. You look Fabulous! I say that everyone should dress how they feel and wear what makes them happy! I know I always will.

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  86. You are a minx, a sexy one at that....you should not change your look as its perfect..infact even if you ever do go grey I think you'd rock that look too, you'll def be the most sexiest and stylish "gran" about if you did and the most colourfulist!

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  87. I don't understand how a number can define what you're allowed and not allowed to wear! I haven't come across this issue personally being 21 ha ha. But I'm sure I'll face adversity when I'm older. I'm starting to learn to wear what makes me happy and I think that's more important than what some boring person thinks.

    xx

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  88. I like getting older! I feel far more confident now with my own style then I ever did in my teens and 20s. 'Rules' make me laugh. I'm in my soon to be mid 30s and I should apparently be wearing shades of camel and taupe and have subtle highlights and discreet make up. Yeah right! :S

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  89. Cliff is just feral, isn't he?! Love the Dollyrockers dress, and love your attitude.xx.

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  90. It's something that makes my blood boil. A woman can never be right; out of work, you have to walk a tightrope of looking younger than you are but 'age appropriate'. So it isn't really looking younger- it's looking like you've made the effort to appear younger and can afford the products (not the same thing at all). At work, the precise reverse: the target is to look late-30s-to-early-40s even if the norm for the level of promotion is 28, but not look 'frumpy'. I have been told my round face makes people think I'm younger and therefore trust me less (by one of those management coaches who became one cause they couldn't cut it in teaching/management...she looked like the blonde one out of How Clean Is Your House). I asked her how to change this exactly, wear a grey wig or something? Additionally, if it was a massive problem how come my career was just fine? Bizarre. And of course, it only seems to apply to women.

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  91. Testify, sister!

    Age appropriate, schmage appropriate.

    You look amazingly beautiful, as always, and I am so glad to have you as my friend and spokeswoman on this issue! That frock is killer.

    Cliff is about as sexy as trifle. BLLLECCCHHH!!

    Love! Sarah xxx

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  92. Paaaah, this book sounds ridiculous! Absolutely well said, you are gorgeous & good on you for not feeling the need to dress like others & be 'age appropriate'.

    xoxo.

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  93. Blimey I think that book should just suggest shut yourself in a cupboard your life is over! Or would wearing a cupboard for the rest of your life make you look old I wonder? ;0)

    I really hate books and articles like that telling women how they should look at whatever stage of life they are at. We are all different and I think its how you feel personally that matters. And I can't see my love of long skirts and dress waning any over the next few years either. Well luckily I have never been a follower of fashion as such so shan't listen to such rubbish! lol. And as you always look brilliant you definately shouldnt be bothered either!

    Well although Kieth or Cliff do not rock my world I used have a huge crush on Steven Tyler. And i bet he has some stories to tell! Have fun while you can I always say you are only here for a bit and no on their death bed wishes they went to bed early and drank more water more do they. :0)


    MBB x

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  94. who cares about age, i don't, you know it by now! I have all my downfalls as well, it comes with 51 and menopause but does not really matter, i am better and have the firm intention of enjoying life to the fullest!

    Now will see if Franca of Orange and Apples will write some french to me!

    Lots of love - Ariane xxx

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  95. If you were to take all of these rules into account, you would not exactly be left with much choice on what to wear or how to do you hair. I have always liked to avoid a kind of generic look and to look individual and as I get older I am hoping that I will become more confident to do so even more.

    I love your style! Whoever wrote these rules is very boring and anyway rules are meant to be broken.

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  96. Caption: The only rule is 'NO RULES'

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  97. Yeah man!! Your life is on your face, I don't want a flippin smooth one!! x

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  98. Everyone should dress as they please regardless of age. Who wants to be a clone of everyone else and we are too long dead! xx

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  99. That book sounds terrible. You are fabulous Vix - a style queen with an amazing figure and you are a complete sweetheart too...I'd say thats one big middle finger up to the authors of the book. Love ya Scarlett x

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  100. another well-said post, dear vix! really doesn't care at all if you look your age as long as you look like your own person :)

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  101. I admire your spirit and love the idea of taking pride in having a body that shows a life well lived, and yes, Keith Richards is way sexier looking than Sir Cliff.

    Your hair looks great parted in the middle!

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  102. Firstly Vix- you look gorgeous.
    Secondly- I can read this knowing as always this comes from the bottom of your heart. You are a true role model to women of ALL ages. Age is such a rubbish excuse for people to preach how we should dress/look/act.
    Age is what it is. And it shouldn’t define us nor dictate us.
    Well done Vix to reaching out to so many people xxx

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  103. Preach it! I'm 42, and there are times when I am absolutely amazed that I lived to this age! Let alone healthy & with all body parts intact. I always tell people I'm too damned old to any longer care what people think of the way I dress or how I look. Oddly, this has meant a remarkable uptick in the quality of my wardrobe! It's also added a lot more variety to what I wear as well. Love your blog!

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Thanks for reading and for leaving a message. Please don't be anonymous, I'd love it if you left a name (or a nom de plume).

Lots of love, Vix