Hostess With The Mostest

 That's a proper dinner party dress, I thought, when I unfolded this vintage maxi from Linda's parcel of joy, already picturing my hair piled high in a huge topknot, draped across the kitchen table, sharing my favourite recipe for dhal fry served up in my groovy collection of retro tableware.

Talk about the best laid plans and all that.... this morning, as well as my roots, I've managed to dye my forehead a lovely shade of Superdrug's Natural Black, which no amount of nail polish remover has managed to shift - so there's fat chance of an elegant up-do.

And, if I'm not battling with a cat (or three) for possession of the kitchen table,

it's Jon with his Novum Deluxe IV sewing machine and a pile of vintage old men trousers to be skinnied up. There's precious room for me, Sixties ceramics and South Indian delicacies.

Jon, Walsall's answer to Billy Idol

If you're wondering about his sewing talents they hark back to his punk days. He couldn't afford Vivienne Westwood's prices so, like me, he used his mum's Singer to customise stuff he'd bought from jumble sales. We really are a match made in heaven!

In the absence of kitchen space you'll have to make do with my corner of the lounge, the bit not littered with salted peanuts, biscuit crumbs, cat hair and clippings from VW Camper magazine. You'll notice my chair is strategically placed next to the bar (those knitted poodles house the Lidl rum & value cola, I'm such a classy bird).

1970s Crimplene hostess dress worn with Ultraviolet opaques (Xmas, 2010), orange suede platforms (Helga the great) and an Urban Outfitters neon & perspex belt (present from Liz, 2011), Beaded earrings (Auroville Ashram, Pondicherry, India 2011)

Plans for the weekend? Ours will no doubt involve real ale, curry and avoiding the forecast snow as much as humanely possible.

Have a good one & see you soon!

PS Check out our friend Jo's amazing portraits of Curtise, Sandra and me.